You’ve just cleaned up dinner, and you’re counting down the minutes to bedtime. Your child asks you for a snack before bed, and without notice, a wave of heat swallows your body; you scream, you feel trapped, and you just can’t take it anymore. Shortly after, a wave of guilt overcomes you as you try to piece together the unwarranted reaction to a tiny human asking for something to eat. As a graduate student and mother of three, I’ve experienced firsthand the often-unspoken phenomenon known as “mom rage.” This intense and overwhelming anger can seemingly appear out of nowhere, leaving many mothers questioning their own sanity. Through my personal journey and studies, I’ve gained valuable insights into the causes and management of mom rage, which I’m eager to share with fellow parents.
Mom rage can stem from various factors, including the unpaid emotional labour involved in parenting, financial strain, body image issues, stressors related to becoming or being a mom, and postpartum hormonal changes. It’s essential to recognize that mom rage is distinct from typical anger, as it’s often more intense and unpredictable. Symptoms can range from verbal or physical outbursts to a general sense of frustration and loss of control.
As a counselling graduate student, I understand the importance of addressing the underlying causes of mom rage to effectively manage and prevent it. One crucial factor to consider is the mental load that mothers often bear. The constant responsibility of juggling various aspects of family life can be exhausting and lead to feelings of burnout. To counteract this, it’s vital for mothers to practice self-care and seek support from partners, family, or friends.
Another critical aspect is addressing the societal expectations and pressures placed on mothers. Unrealistic standards and the ‘perfect mom’ ideal can contribute to feelings of inadequacy and anger. As a society, we must normalize the challenges mothers face and create a more supportive environment that embraces imperfection and prioritizes mental health. In addition to societal changes, individual practices can help mothers cope with mom rage. Pausing and reflecting on the source of anger can be beneficial in regaining control. Practicing deep breathing exercises or other relaxation techniques can also help in calming the mind and body. For more severe cases, seeking professional help, such as therapy, may be necessary.
Mom rage is a genuine and complex issue that affects many mothers and I wholeheartedly empathize with the challenges that come with parenting and encourage fellow moms to prioritize their well-being. By understanding the causes of mom rage and implementing healthy coping strategies, we can better support one another and create a more compassionate environment for all parents. For additional resources, check out the links below:
https://psychcentral.com/health/what-is-mom-rage-and-when-is-it-a-sign-of-bigger-mental-health-issue