One thing that many don’t realize is that there are five stages of divorce that people experience when their marriage dissolves. Divorce is more than just signing papers and splitting assets. It’s a deeply emotional journey, and no one really teaches us how to handle it. You might feel like you’re on a rollercoaster—angry one minute, sad the next, then suddenly wondering if maybe you could still “just be friends.”
Sound familiar? That’s because divorce often mirrors the stages of grief. Just like when we lose someone we love, divorce brings up denial, anger, bargaining, sadness, and eventually, hopefully, acceptance. The 5 stages of divorce don’t always show up in order, and sometimes you circle back more than once. But understanding them can help you feel a little less alone.
What Are The 5 Stages Of Divorce?
The five stages of divorce are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.
Let’s break them down:
Denial
“This can’t really be happening.” At first, it may not feel real. You might find yourself clinging to hope that things could still go back to “normal.” You might even keep texting your ex like nothing’s changed. This is your brain’s way of protecting you from full-on emotional overload.
Anger
“How could they do this to me?” This stage can feel like a fire inside. Maybe you’re angry at your ex, yourself, or the situation in general. Anger can be healthy—it gives you energy and sometimes even clarity. (This is when Lady Gaga’s “I don’t wanna be friends” hits hardest, right?)
Bargaining
“Maybe we can still be friends…” This is the tricky one. Bargaining sounds like, “If I change, maybe they’ll come back,” or “We’ll just stay friends so it’s not so final.” It’s your heart trying to hold onto anything familiar.
Depression
“It’s really over.” This is when the sadness sets in. The reality hits that the life you planned is shifting. You might feel tired, lost, or like nothing makes sense anymore. It’s okay to feel this way.
Acceptance
“It’s over… and I’ll be okay.” This doesn’t mean you’re happy about the divorce. It means you’re starting to make peace with it. You’re creating a new normal and focusing on yourself again. Maybe for the first time in a long time.
Your Divorce Journey
Here’s the truth:
You don’t have to stay friends to prove you’re “the bigger person.”
You don’t have to pretend you’re fine when you’re not.
And you do have the right to protect your peace.
If you’re somewhere between letting go and holding on, you’re not weak—you’re human. The stages of divorce are messy and nonlinear, but they’re also survivable. One day, you’ll look back and realize: choosing yourself wasn’t selfish.
Remember: You’re allowed to say, “I don’t wanna be friends.” And you’re allowed to heal.
Divorce Therapy: Getting Support Through The Stages Of Divorce
Need support? You don’t have to go through this alone. Divorce therapy may be your best route to getting through this journey.
Our team of therapists at Rebound Total Health are here to help you sort through your emotions, set healthy boundaries, and move toward a version of life that actually feels like yours.
At Rebound Total Health, we are committed to helping you achieve a balanced and healthy life.
Book a consultation and start your journey to better mental health today! For news and educational information, follow us on Facebook and Instagram.