Chronic Illness: My Story
In January of 2021 I began experiencing severe joint pain in both knees. At the time I was very active individual and assumed I injured myself during a workout. I did not think much of it and assumed after a week or so of rest I would be fine. As the weeks progressed the joint pain extended to my hips, back and ankles. I had also developed severe muscle weakness in my calves, hamstrings, and quadriceps. I knew this could not be a post workout injury, so I finally went to the doctor. After several doctors’ appointments, x-rays, ultrasounds, and bloodwork there was still no conclusive answers for my muscle and joint pain. It had gotten so bad I could not walk more than 4 or 5 steps without being in intense pain, even when I was sitting or laying down the pain still caused extreme discomfort.
Along with physical pain, my mental health also took a significant nosedive, I got very depressed and extremely irritable. During covid working out had become an integral part of my daily routine, it was a way for me to release my energy while being cooped up in the house all day. Being unable to engage in that physical activity was driving me crazy. Moreover, I had become completely dependent on my parents – I had to rely on them for moving, eating, and even showering, leaving me feel completely helpless. I was also frustrated at my doctor for not being able to figure out what was going on and frustrated with my body as it felt my body was giving up on me.
By the end of March, I was able to start walking again – but slowly and for short periods of time. By April it felt like I was back to normal, and I was more than excited to start exercising again. My depression began to drastically improved, however my anxiety began to kick in each time I would start to exercise. Suddenly, I was very aware of my body and nervous that if I did something wrong, I would begin getting pain again. I lived with this constant fear for almost a year.
It wasn’t until a year later, when my doctor ordered routine bloodwork, that I learned I had Hashimoto’s disease. It is an autoimmune disorder that causes your body to attack your thyroid, ultimately developing into hypothyroidism. It explained the muscle weakness and joint pain I was experiencing, and it was likely a contributing factor to the depression. The doctor informed me that I needed to start taking medication immediately and the type of medication that is required, once I began taking it I would have to take it for life. This seemed intimidating, I did not want to become dependent on medication, but I also did not want this random pain. Alongside medication my doctor also recommended certain lifestyle changes, such limiting alcohol and sugar, starting an anti-inflammatory diet, and taking a variety of supplements.
I began to feel very overwhelmed; I was still trying to process the fact that I developed an auto-immune disease and now I had to make all these changes in my lifestyle. It became too much for me to deal with on my own so I had reached out to a counsellor who could help me process the news. They encouraged me to reach out to join a peer support group with others in the same situation. It was actually very helpful to hear from others, I learned tips for managing my auto immune disease as well as got to talk about the frustrations of making a major lifestyle change very quickly.
Getting diagnosed with a chronic illness can be scary and difficult to manage on your own. If you have recently got diagnosed with a chronic illness, I encourage you to reach out to your doctor and seek support through peer groups, counselling, and even friends and family.
